Sometimes this recovery is its own special hell, not because
it is overly difficult physically, but it can just play with your mind. Lat
night I a terrible moment when my legs all cramped up and my calves didn’t seem
to work. At one point I plodded about the house trying to pull it all together.
What caused it? Shit if I know.
But it brought back a flood of memories and feelings about
when chemo made my legs did not work. Don’t get me wrong it wasn’t the same
thing. For a few minutes though, I was back in the middle of that frikkin
moment about 18 months ago when the neuropathy and neurotoxicity were their
worst.
I just started to cry.
I took a hot bath and it all went away. It was probably that
I took the dogs on a walk wearing loafers, or the insane workout I did the day before
gong up and down stairs, or my shitty diet. Still it shared the bejeezus out of
me.
Well something funny tomorrow.
No comments:
Post a Comment