veteran's rant

Everyone one loves a good parade right?

Seems that way after the recent St. Louis parade, honoring Iraq veterans was such a success and has inspired cities all over the U.S. to consider holding their own parades.

Parades suck!

They’re an ephemeral dodge to placate the guilt of the citizenry, when the real honoring of our veterans and military retirees should be done in the federal budget.

Woo hoo! Let’s throw tickertape around and get those high school bands a-marching while veteran and military retiree programs lay on the chopping block of the deficit hawks.

Let’s march down Main Street while veteran unemployment and suicide rates continue to soar; that’ll show how much we care.

NO increased spending in veterans programs mind you – oh but we’ll have a dandy parade, sell some balloons, and remind ourselves that this is how a grateful nation behaves with its warriors.

And all the while our elected leaders will gut veteran and military retiree programs in darkened rooms behind locked doors. There is a national debt after all they’ll say – they’re right it’s a debt of conscience, not money.

So before we go to the big parade and spend a couple of hours standing, clapping, and saluting the flag, let’s spend about a half an hour – just a half an hour and drop your congressional delegation an email and remind them that the bogeyman they need to worry about isn’t the debt, but rather the scary prospect that quality men and women will no longer sign up for military service if parades are all we do to show how a grateful nation behaves.

I guess that’s it I need to get my float ready.

Bill

Feeling a bit better; dogs gone wild 2

Good Morning:

I know I should be keeping up with this better than I am, but this damn cough has sapped me of my strength and enthusiasm, but I’m feeling a bit better today. A couple of things to report though. Had a chest X-Ray done, a sinus CT (I think it was a ruse to see if I really have a brain; I suspect the Secretary ordered it), and some blood work. I threatened them by saying my sister would start calling if they didn’t do some tests. They complied.

Last week was a new record for me as I walked three miles and rode the recumbent bike for 50 minutes (it feels like I’ve typed these words before? If I weren’t so lazy I’d check my files documents folder).

Buzz is very sick. He hasn’t eaten on his own since Saturday. He has some kind of pancreatitis, or hepatitis, or some kind of titis. He is a jerk as far as getting him to take medicine goes. I have to crush his pills, mix ‘em with water, put that slurry in a syringe, and chase him around the house trying to squirt the medicine down his throat. At one point last night he bared his teeth at me as a warning. I may have to resort to taking him for rides in the pick up truck (he loves cruising and sits there with his mouth open) and while he’s lounging about the cab slowly slides a pill down his throat.

Harry is the one I wish were sick. This photo is not of a garbage dump; a mafia body drop site; the tattered remains of a Seal Team Six raid; or a picture of my college dorm room (there is no … um, well, never mind). It is a photo of my little home office that Harry decorated yesterday with contents of several full bags of recycling. He has lost his mind.

Those of you who know me well, realize that housekeeping is pretty low on the things I worry about meter – as long as I have my books, guitars, and other toys I’m pretty happy. So I was even more upset with Harry when he went nuts in the spot where I had vacuumed the day before – that’s why I don’t do it too much. Cleanliness is so, so, er ephemeral.

I guess that’s it I’ll try to do better as far as updates go. 

scatology and heart rates

1/26/12 5:26 AM

Good morning or afternoon as it may be.

Well, I am in the middle of week two of going back to work and it’s actually getting better. My stamina is improving a bit and the work is still pretty fun. My cough is still hanging around, but the doctor has me on some antibiotics.

I told her to open the medicine cabinet and give me the good diarrhea producing stuff – you know the antibiotics that make your stomach gurgle. She gave me some blue pills and if I weren’t so lazy I’d go out the kitchen and tell you the name of them all – but, alas I am lazy.

One of those unfun tasks dog owners have is picking up puppy poop periodically. I was out back late yesterday afternoon and suffice it to say I have overwhelming scatological evidence that Harry has been the main culprit in the dog mutiny I told you about the other day. I mean overwhelming evidence.

I set a new record for walking the day before yesterday and finished about three miles. It really was a beautiful day. It wore me out though and I slept for about an hour in my recliner when we got back, but still three miles is pretty good. 60 days ago it would have been way less.

I am also up to 50 minutes on the recumbent bike at the middle (level 15) resistance level. It seems to take forever to get my heart rate up to a good 120 to 141 beats per minute, which is a pretty good target heart rate since 166 is about the max for a 54 year old.

According to the Mayo Clinic this is how you calculate heart rates:

For vigorous exercise, aim for a target heart rate of 70 to 85 percent of your maximum heart rate (MHR). Your MHR (roughly calculated as 220 minus your age) is the upper limit of what your cardiovascular system can handle during physical activity.

These numbers are estimates that provide an average value. Many people have a higher or lower MHR, sometimes by as much as 15 to 20 beats per minute. Disagreement exists on how to most accurately estimate your MHR and what percentage range to target.

Getting up and writing this blog in the morning seems like the only time I’m gonna do it. When I get home from work I have lunch, take a snooze and then work out, After that I’ll shower and then putter about and check my email. I supposed I could write then, but Dr. Phil’s on (only kidding).

I guess that’s it huh? Pretty boring stuff.

Bill

dogs gone wild

It was Friday night and the evening air was as heavy as a rain soaked shroud. My gal and I unlocked the door and right away we knew something was out of place. The light from the railroad tracks beyond the fence shone through the line of windows, making the inside of our living room look like one of those noir movies where you see dark lines of shadow crossing the interior of a room.

It looked like some county jail. The main inmate stared at us as we walked in from his perch on the well-worn futon. At his feet we shards of plastic from CD cases, destroyed DVD boxes, and the remainder of a Fruit Loops box that I had planned to empty later into a bowl and eat in front of him. .

He just smiled that smile that says it all – “Yeah I did it and I’d do it again.”

My gal, my mol, the Bonnie to my Clyde flicked on the kitchen light. And there it was. The evidence we have been looking for.

From the front door through the hallway and into kitchen were the shredded remains of a 30-pound bag of dog food, destroyed Amazon.com boxes, and crushed clear plastic candy containers shaped like Christmas ornaments.

“Bill, oh Bill Look what they did,” my gal said.

“Don’t worry baby we’ll figure this out,” I said as I pulled her to my side to comfort her from the doggy devastation.

“There’s not much to figure out,” she said pulling away from me. “You went back to work and now the dogs are upset.”

“Easy,” I said. “We need to investigate this and interview these mugs before we jump to conclusions. We go where the evidence leads.”

My gal got all four dogs in the kitchen. Sitting there on the white ceramic tile floor with the overhead light burning it wouldn’t be long until they spoke.

“Okay who did this?” I asked.

They were all dummying up on me.

“Who did this?” I asked again, only this time I shouted. “I’m getting nowhere baby.”

“I’ll get  ‘em to talk,” she said.

My gal picked up a piece of the ripped bag and put it in front of the pooch lineup. Three of dogs didn’t react, but the biggest one Harry looked away as if he had never seen it before. If he could’ve, he would’ve nervously whistled.

“Ah ha,” my gal said. “He’s guilty.”

I couldn’t argue. Her interviewing skills were far superior to mine for getting to the root of canine criminality.

As we went to bed we could hear all four of them grinding their teeth as if there were left over pieces of cardboard in their gums.

I can’t swear to it, but I think the cutest Pearl was smiling as she licked her lips.

Harry seemed like he was laughing. 

1st week back

Hey guys:

The first week of work is behind me and it was kind of difficult, yet a pleasure to be back. It wears one down so much more than you think it would. Trying to catch up and make adjustments to other people when you’ve spent the last eight months either asleep, managing side effects, or talking to pets is a change for sure. The dogs don’t talk back that often; people seem to chat more than animals. Go figure.

Anyway, I had a little chemo brain now and then as I stumbled for names of people I should immediately know; thank God they wear security badges or I’d be sunk. The ladies at the office have been great looking out for me. I need adult supervision. At first I was going to make my afternoons more productive, but I’ve been resting after work. I’m sure my stamina will improve with time once I get used to working again.

I am still fighting this persistent cough and it is having a negative impact on my working out. This cough – which has been hanging on since September – is causing me to scale back my walking and recumbent biking because I’m not quite sure what to do to mitigate it. It makes me a bit uneasy.

There can be a real sense of abandonment when one goes from active patient to recovering survivor (if that makes sense). For example, I wanted to get some advice on this freaking cough so I called my oncologist’s office Friday, a few months ago they were concerned about the cough, but now not so much.

I was told to see my primary care physician. Now I’m glad to do that, but I’m kind of scared that I might contract pneumonia from this cough and – well – people with compromised immune systems tend not fare so well when that happens. Luckily I have no fever or any other symptoms, so I am probably oaky. I intend to send him a letter expressing my concerns.

I just finished a 10-day course of antibiotics prescribed by my family doc and that did nothing to help. In fact if I had to swear to it in court, I’d say I was coughing up way more goop than before. Is that normal? Who the heck knows – surely not me? I’ll call the doc Monday and get in there in the afternoon. I am truly tired of not feeling well; I have felt sucky since last February and if I could get rid of this cough I would be way happier.

I guess that’s it for now,

Bill

naps, dogs and workouts

Good morning gang:

The more I do this the more I realize that recovering from Cancer is truly a community event and everyone who is involved whether expressing a vibe of concern or carting you to an appointment become stakeholders.

Yesterday when I went to the office the people there had a welcome back breakfast kind of thing for me. I was very touched.

Work itself is going okay and I’m not experiencing a whole lot of residual chemo side effect problems at the moment. I have a little chemo-brain, but it seems like most of the people my age have it too – so maybe I’m just an old goat. I am a bit fatigued by the end of my half-day schedule.  And that is kind of causing me to figure out how to best plot my day. The two things I must do every day are; Go to work and work out.

Here’s the rub. Yesterday when I got home I plopped down at about 1 p.m. for a quick nap and ended up investing 90 minutes in that. When I woke up it was 2:30 or so and I still hadn’t worked out, walked the dogs, or took care of a couple of other things I needed to accomplish. I rushed through my recumbent bike workout and dog walk so I could be done by 4 pm.

I have this gym membership at a facility near work I plan to use at lunchtimes when I go back to full schedule in mid-February, but in the meantime I am working out at home. Anyway I need to play with eliminating the naps – bit by bit – so I can last a whole workday (I won’t start this nap drawdown today for sure).

I think I’ll rearrange my schedule this way. I’ll work out as soon as I get home instead of napping first and see how the time and fatigue stacks up. I guess the learning point for me is to tinker with my after work schedule so I can meet my goals and still not stress myself out.

I guess that’s it for now.

See you all tomorrow,

Bill

First day back

Good morning all:

Yesterday was a good first day back at work. The half-day schedule thing seems like it is a real good idea. Or is it a really good idea – I always get real and really mixed up. The old axiom of “Graveyards are full of indispensible men” may be true, but if you don’t die the work does pile up while your gone.

My boss and the folks at DOL are pretty insistent that I follow the ½ day thing until I work my way back. That’s a good thing. When I got home yesterday I crashed for about 90 minutes. I still have some stamina to work on. I discovered I really can’t wear a belt right now as the leather goes over my scar and it is still a bit tender at this point.

I haven’t experienced any cognitive problems yet (chemo brain) so that’s good and my hands and feet haven’t had any neuropathy symptoms so that’s good news too. I’m at the tail end of a persistent cough.

My workout schedule is going slower than I wanted, but it is what it is. I’ve experienced some abdominal pain from the scarring and I’ve had this persistent cough I’ve been babying along.  

I’m up to 2 ¼ miles now of walking. I walked about a mile yesterday afternoon. For some reason I am very tentative about running. I’ll do the recumbent bike and other stuff, but there is something holding me back; I can’t put my finger on it. My little voice – like George Costanza’s is an idiot – but it keeps saying, “not yet.” So I am waiting.

Right now my workout regimen is this:

Monday- walk or recumbent bike

Tuesday – Yoga using the Wii machine

Wednesday – Walk or recumbent bike

Thursday – Yoga using Wii machine

Friday – New Personal Record for Walk or Recumbent Bike

Saturday – get coffee at Starbucks

Sunday – play with dogs at Bark Park

As you can see it is pretty much the same workout as a nursing home resident. Oh well.

Have a great day,

Bill