Monday, December 30, 2013
And it’s bronchitis
Well boys and girls it appears I have a good dose of bronchitis. Probably the worst case f it in the history of man. On antibiotics, codeine, and an inhaler. Cranky, but not dying.
Still sick
You’d think by now I couldn’t be rattled, but this flu/cold/URI has thrown me for a loop. Yikes. I am so hoarse, my voice sounds like it’s being run through scrambling software to keep me in the witness protection program. Fudgesicles! I ani’t happy.
Now this is truly stupid -- I hate missing a Monday of Friday at work, It just looks bad. Can’t stand it. Today will make it a Monday and I missed Friday. Fu, u, u dgesicles.
Got a doctor’s appointment at 0900 to be told I’m okay, just a hypochondriac. I bet I’m fine. My blood on the 23rd was good, ANC a bit high, WBC okay, Red a smidge low. Other than that good. so we’ll see what the doc says.
I guess that’s it!
Bill
Now this is truly stupid -- I hate missing a Monday of Friday at work, It just looks bad. Can’t stand it. Today will make it a Monday and I missed Friday. Fu, u, u dgesicles.
Got a doctor’s appointment at 0900 to be told I’m okay, just a hypochondriac. I bet I’m fine. My blood on the 23rd was good, ANC a bit high, WBC okay, Red a smidge low. Other than that good. so we’ll see what the doc says.
I guess that’s it!
Bill
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Sick this week
Okay, going thru my first real sickness since remission began and it is scaring the shit out of me. You always hear stories -- at least I do -- of people being in reemission for a couple of years, catching kid crud and dying. Even though that is unlikely, it’s still hanging in the back of my mind. Shit ....
My sniffles have gradually become worse since December 23. I’ve been in bed since Christmas Eve. Last night my fever was about 101 and was kind of freaked, but my wife of 30 years (anniversary last night) took care of me and my fever broke -- I hope.
I guess that’s it. See you,
My sniffles have gradually become worse since December 23. I’ve been in bed since Christmas Eve. Last night my fever was about 101 and was kind of freaked, but my wife of 30 years (anniversary last night) took care of me and my fever broke -- I hope.
I guess that’s it. See you,
Monday, December 23, 2013
results
Okay. It’s a good day. I still have the sniffles, but that’s it. My blood looks good. Platelets still a little low and everything else is normal or close. So good news. I have to go back in six months. I was hoping for a year, but six months is cool!
appt. today
Whenever I have these oncology/hematology appointments I get
a bit freaked out. I review every possible complication and play it over in my
mind and eventually think myself into a near panic. In the end it comes out
okay,
If all goes well today I will be in the “come back and see
me next year” category. Fingers crossed!
I woke up with a sore throat this morning. Yech! And the
sniffles. If I didn’t have a stupid board meeting at 0800 and then my
appointment at 0940 I’d go bak to bed and stay there all day. I’d just hunker
down with me and Louis L’amour, rustle some cattle, and take naps all day.
Yikes!
I still haven’t forsaken my goal of chucking it all and
playing. I am still trying to maneuver myself into that, but it has been hard
to pull it all together. The money I mean. I wanted some seed money to make it
easier, but lately I’ve been thinking about letting the bank repossess
everything and just walking away. Who knows? Fu#@K.
Friday, December 20, 2013
update I guess
Hey guys:
Haven’t been posting lately. No real reason why. A couple of
bits of news.
1. I have a big appointment Monday. Six Month check up, if
everything goes well the next one will be in a year. A bit of Petechiae on my
arms; a bit freaked out, but I’m probably okay.
2. Joined a playwriting group and am working on a cancer
comedy. Halfway through.
3. No news on job front. They still haven’t made a decision.
Friday, December 13, 2013
Poop, damn, damn, sh@t
I got the blues. I’m pretty sure I didn’t get the job I went
after in Eugene, Oregon. It’s been more than a week and as they wanted to move
fast, I’m pretty sure they would have called. Poop!
I hate losing. I really do. It just frosts my cake (not in a
good way). I guess I’ll just cool my heels for a while and see what happens. It
could be a lot worse I guess. My job is okay, although I want to be in charge.
It’s just that I prepared my tail off for this thing. I’m
talking hours of research, hours of rehearsals, and hours of flying in cramped
airlines. Not to mention burning four days vacation.
I didn’t get much sleep last night; the thumb in my mouth
was very distracting.
More later,
Poop!
Bu
Wednesday, December 11, 2013
feeling smug
I was recently thinking/ I don’t probably do that near
enough. Regardless. I’m feeling pretty smug today. No word on the job yet – I don’t
expect to get a call; I except a politely worded “thanks, but no thanks”
letter.
I’m smug because I took a chance at a big step that could
take me out of my comfort zone and throw my world into a tizzy/ That’s kind of
the definition of living I think -- taking chances.
Two years ago. Cancer survivor. Blah, blah, just thought I’d throw in the Reader’s Digest version; this
part is pretty self-aggrandizing and pretty predictable/
It took a lot for me to get off my backside and step into
the fray and I am quite smug about tit all. I guess that’s it.
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
Mums the word
Recovery is a funny thing. You work at it. You run hundreds
of miles, drink hundreds of gallons less than you used to, obsess about every
ache pain and symptom real or imagined all in the quest to make it back to
“normal.”
And then after two years you think you’re ready to take the
plunge to try a new thing on for size that takes you from the nest you built
when you were sick, but still you drive forward.
At 1200 hours today Kate dropped me off at the Philadelphia
airport for a journey that is taking me to Eugene Oregon for a job interview
that could bring me more money and prestige than I currently have at my
position with the Delaware Department of Labor. But there is something that
makes me uncomfortable about it all. I’m not sure if it is leaving my doctor
behind, my support group, the
geezers I play golf with, even my
new exalted position as the Chairman of the LLS patient Services Committee, or
even the playwriting groups I recently joined.
Hmmm. My goal has always been to find my way back west and
toss it all in favor of a life of smelling the roses, but somehow I’ve gotten a
bit sidetracked. And maybe that’s the thing that is bugging me is that I am
chasing this new job instead of sticking to my plan of chasing a rainbow or
two. I tell myself that the increase in ay would be enough to get us going
quickly once we sell the house. Maybe it’s true, but somehow I feel as though
I’m betraying myself by going after a new job.
Kate asked me why I was doing this and in a moment of
honesty I told her I wanted to be in charge. I don’t know. Maybe I’ve looked
for validation from my professional life for so long that I am trying to dodge
relaxing. It doesn’t feel that way, but maybe it is true.
So here I am at 0032 hours on a small puddle jumper Delta
connector plane bouncing from Salt Lake to Eugene for a big job interview I’m
not sure I really want anyway. Who knows though? Maybe I do want it. You see
that’s the catch. Maybe I do.
Some of the best advice I ever got was from this guy who
said, “The time to turn down a job isn’t before they offer it to you.” There is a lot to that.
So the plan is this. I’m going to do the best I can to win
the job and then make my decision. Tomorrow at about 1030 I will get picked up
at my hotel, taken to the Lane County Public Services Building and give the
staff a presentation, then off to an hour long interview with a slction
committee, then a writing exercise, and then I’m done until Thursday when I
have to meet the board and give them a presentation.
Yikes!
Love to all,
Bill
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